Perhaps you noticed my absence last week as the blog sat untouched in the interwebs. I’ve had some long days and am navigating my new schedule, working traditional office hours and then driving my son to and from his very first job in the evenings. We always manage to squeeze in some gym time, and on some nights, that’s left me peeling off my yoga pants at 11 p.m.
So I’m adjusting to the new “rhythm” of my life, learning where to put my feet and how to dance through these different details of my days. New routines can be difficult, but I’m glad I made the changes and am enjoying the challenges they present.
The first week at my new job, I learned the managing editor who hired me, my direct supervisor and a woman with whom I had initially bonded, would be leaving the company to pursue a position in another city. This seemingly impromptu decision shocked me and my department. I spent a few moments with that “rug pulled out from underneath me” feeling, wondering what the hell I’d signed up for. But then I remembered…
Life is fluid.
This is where the phrase “rhythm of life,” gets complicated. It’s like that myth about achieving “balance.” Both are illusions. Because we cannot anticipate how and when the ground will shift, and we can’t fully learn the patterns or paths of our lives. Life’s cadence exists in change. And that’s both exciting and terrifying. But as I said in a previous post, planning is good but too much thinking takes me away from this moment. Life does not live outside of this moment, so why do we?
Here’s what I’ve been meditating on this week:
Life is a rhythmless dance, a shapeless expanse.
Today, she gently taps like raindrops on rooftops. Tedious. Slow.
Tomorrow, she is sheer desire, aspiration unspoken.
All I know is that I don’t know.
I ask myself, how can I be okay with that?
How can I honor uncertainty?
There’s a freedom in letting go.
Mantra: All problems are illusions of the mind ~ Eckhart Tolle