I recently ran into a few friends I hadn’t seen in a while. Loitering between rows of neatly stacked spice jars and gluten-free snack boxes, we had a spirited reunion in aisle 6 at the grocery store. We talked about a mutual friend and how her life had shifted – her career, abrupt move to a new city, and all the subsequent changes. “It’s funny how you can travel a path for so long, with your feet moving on familiar ground, and then there’s this unforeseen bend in the road,” my friend mused. “But things worked out well for her. What a shock!”
I thought about that statement. I realized that it wasn’t a shock – not for me. I was not surprised that our friend was faring well, despite life’s seemingly crude interruption. It wasn’t because she had any answers. In fact, she spent a while contemplating her next move. Regardless, she had peace that never left, even while a storm shook her life. Her intangible resolve stood like a flag in firm soil, waving in the wind of her circumstances. A tenacious woman with a can-do attitude, she is continuously teaching me this important lesson about excuses: there are none.
Her situation reminded me of one of the most difficult experiences I’d endured: divorce. One day I was a married mother, sporting an apron and stirring gravy for the family meal. Then the lights went out in my life, leaving me feverishly probing for something firm and familiar.
Looking back I can see with unbounded certainty that I needed a new direction. It was tough without that extra pair of hands to hold my boys when mine were full, but I learned to trust my own strength. Truth is, I was incredibly unhappy in my marriage and desperately wanted a change but was afraid of the unknown.
For a long time, I convinced myself that a bad husband was better than no husband, and that my boys would be better off with the family intact. Sometimes we stay in unpleasant places simply because we don’t have the courage to stand up and walk on unfamiliar ground. Like a cold dog in the rain, I miserably guarded my buried bones.
Believe The Best is Yet to Come
My friend and I had one thing in common: the unexpected. Making a new “normal” is never easy. She did so with grace and confidence. I did it with fear. Regardless, we both found our way, although I’m certain her journey was far more enjoyable. If I could go back and chat with my newly divorced self, I would place a mug of steaming tea on the table and offer my fear-racked, fresh-faced self a sip. “You got this, girl,” I’d say. “Not because you’re strong enough, smart enough, or broken enough for repair. You will find the life you long for because even while your hands shake and your heart aches, you believe the best is yet to come.”
In his book The Power of Intention, Dr. Wayne Dyer describes a power that exists in the universe, and in all of creation. He calls it intention. An acorn contains intention—the potential to become a mighty oak. An apple seed contains the capacity to become a ripe fruit. When you surrender to this same force, you link up to the field of intention and move with the positive flow of the universe.
If you feel stuck in your surroundings, make the shift in your mind towards belief.
Mantra: My best life is suspended just above my obstacles. Today I reach out to grab all the goodness that awaits.