Here’s Why You Should Unsubscribe from this Blog

I’m a full-time writer/editor with a diverse client roster. I write for doctors, life coaches, conservative business owners, and media companies with varying standards and style guides. All day, every day I cater to these folks, crafting content that meets their respective needs. Enter this blog — my breathing space. It’s where I strip off the suit and slip into my skin. I write when I’m giddy. I write when I’m moody. I write to feel the world and purge my soul of its impact. It’s what writers do. I don’t apologize for that.

I started this blog with one goal in mind: to inspire myself and my readers. I hoped that every post would be brilliant and spa-like in its ability to transport you to someplace amazing. But I also knew there’d be days when my dark side took over and spilled something more potent on the page. There’d be posts about penises, divorce and my dog. Why? Because this is my life, and this is my blog. This stuff is real; this stuff is raw. So while I always strive to inspire, I refuse to dilute myself here. I love you, dear reader, I do, but I own these words. I won’t make excuses for them.

What One Reader Said to Prompt This Post…

After publishing the aforementioned “penis post,” I received notice that someone had unsubscribed from this blog, stating the reason as follows:

“I went on my device to be inspired…but reading your graphic post at 6am left my stomach turning. I could have gotten the idea without all the details and was also left feeling violated. Sometimes we don’t need to repeat disgust to stop it.”

This did not shock me. It did not offend me or leave me wondering whether I had been too “graphic.” I said what I needed to say in my passion-fueled post. It felt good and right when I wrote it. There was a time when I pleased people. I wrote things that were flowery. I weighed every word and sought every opinion before I’d ever hit “publish” on a post. A derogatory comment in my inbox would damage my fragile ego and leave me rethinking my work. But you live and you learn, and hopefully you get to a place where you can believe in yourself, humbly accept criticism, and fully understand that not everyone will be a fan. As Pink so eloquently said it, “They don’t like my jeans. They don’t get my hair.”

This blog represents ME, with messy hair, with yoga pants and not-so-yogic thoughts. I’m not a Yoga Mat Goddess; I am a Yoga Mat Monkey, I thought we established that. And that means I’m imperfect, and silly, and sometimes too much for some folks. But here’s the deal: I don’t care. Not anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I want you here, oh lordy I do, but it’s more important for me to connect with my readers in a real way than to concoct bullshit posts for the popular vote.

If you signed up for this ride by subscribing to my posts, here’s a virtual high five. Yeahhhh buddy! I appreciate you and your ability to endure, possibly even enjoy these ramblings. But if you find me offensive, too brash or too blunt, then do me a favor: unsubscribe to blog updates and clear a small bit of clutter from your inbox. Go support a blogger who speaks your language, who sings the tune that gets your feet tapping. That amazing writer is waiting for your eyes to find his page.

I don’t do fake friendships. I don’t write for applause (although it sure is welcome). If you “like my jeans and get my hair,” I’m glad you came. Hop in and let’s ride.
Mantra: Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken ~ Oscar Wilde

P.S. This post is part of an awesome little linky. Check out some other great bloggers at the party.

59 Comments
  • Carol Cassara
    May 25, 2016

    I hear no objections, do you? 😉

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Not yet, Carol! Thanks for stopping in. Always glad to see you.

  • Shirley Corder
    May 25, 2016

    Okay now WHY couldn’t I see this last time I visited? (Don’t answer!) Enjoyed your rant! And your headline sure had me hooked!

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Well thanks so much, Shirley! Glad you figured it out and I’m happy you liked what you read. Thanks for the support!

  • Jeremy
    May 25, 2016

    I once called all my readers sheep for caring more about a lion than all the starving children in Zimbabwe. Lost a few people over that one. lol

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Ha ha, Jeremy! You win some, you lose some. You rock, sir. 🙂

  • cheryl wilson-stewart
    May 25, 2016

    Well said! Love your undiluted voice:) Keep talkin’

  • Theresa Bailey
    May 25, 2016

    Yup! You do what suits you and if other people don’t like it they can leave. As you said, there are plenty of other blogs out there for them.

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      That’s the truth! Thanks for reading, Theresa. 😀

  • Bethany
    May 25, 2016

    Wow yes!! Exactly what I needed to read as I’m about to publish a rather controversial post!! Thank you Rica ❤️❤️❤️

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Good for you, Bethany! Say what you mean. And thanks for reading and commenting.

  • Lori
    May 25, 2016

    Good for you Yoga Mat Monkey! Keep it real.

  • Tracy Milam
    May 25, 2016

    Blogging should be all about honesty. In truth though, it’s hard to get to the point you are at. I strive for it but still struggle. You give me hope my voice will clear one day soon!

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Tracy, I have learned through much trial and error that our readers latch on to truths, and that when we are more intimate with them, they reward us with their devotion. Those who don’t are just fair weather friends, and they’re not your tribe. If you ever wonder why reality shows are so popular and social media is such a success, remember that people are curious and they really are hungry for interaction. Be bold and confident and say what you feel. Your blog is your space. All the best to you. I am heading over to your site now to support what you’re doing…

  • Jeanamack
    May 25, 2016

    Dear Yoga Mat Monkey,
    I LOVE your blog and you are AWESOME! Your writings, or ramblings–whatever people want to call it, inspire me! I love that you are authentic! I love that you don’t care what others think! Although we all know that you do love your readers, you MUST know we love you the same! Let your passions burn up this blog baby! Let it ignite like a fiery mic! I love you, and everything you stand for….you are the bomb! Continue to inspire your “true” fans.

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Jeanamack, you are a MACK in the truest sense! Thanks for being a fan of this foolish little monkey. What an amazing comment. I sure will cherish it!

  • Susannah
    May 25, 2016

    Absolutely yes! We all need to be ourselves!

  • Chrissy
    May 25, 2016

    Yes, yes, yes! Keeping it real is key and whoever cannot take that better leave! Love this and love that you are you no matter what! You go girl! xxx

  • Lindsay
    May 25, 2016

    AMEN Sista!

    People seriously got their knickers in a bunch over your Penis post? IT’S THE TRUTH! There are a ton of disgusting, vile people out there that feel the need to share that shit and that ain’t cool!

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Yup, Lindsay, knickers all bunched up! ha ha. I’m all for talking about rainbows and puppies, but sometimes we have to address the hard stuff. It ain’t pretty, but it’s necessary. Thanks so much for your humor, and for supporting my views on the matter. Much appreciated. 🙂

  • Bren Pace
    May 25, 2016

    Amen gf! Not everyone is going to like what you write, however it is YOUR site and YOU write what YOU want! Rock on!

  • Peggy
    May 25, 2016

    Rica…awesome Rica! You’re speaking what’s been on my mind. 🙂

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Great minds think alike, Peggy! So glad to see you here. Thanks for stopping by my little corner of the Web!

  • Kwame
    May 25, 2016

    I love your honesty. Life’s too short to fake it or worry about pleasing people. I write about tanpons, relationships, my resting bitch face and more because like you my blog is my outlet. If my words resonates with ppl great but they are not my focus. I need to read that penis post now! Lol. Keep being you. I’m totally subscribing that woman was just kneeing my space warm.

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Omg, Kwame! You are it, girl! I’m definitely taking a trip to your site to see about this tampon talk. But first, I must put on my resting bitch face…

  • Tamuria
    May 25, 2016

    Bravo! I love to read the things that are really authentic and I have been a happy subscriber for some time now and am still enjoying the ride. That Oscar Wilde quote is one of my favourites.

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Awww, Tamuria! 💓💓 That’s the best news I’ve heard all day! Thank you, my dear.

  • Liv
    May 25, 2016

    Really? Who doesn’t love a graphic penis post at 6 am. It’s almost as good as a real penis at 6 am.

    • Rica Lewis
      May 25, 2016

      Ha ha, Liv! You’re the best!

    • Kimmie
      May 29, 2016

      Hahahahahaha! This comment is (almost) as good as the post 🙂

  • Phoebe
    May 26, 2016

    I love that you are totally unapologetically yourself! We need more people to stay true to themselves -I’m actually sick of reading otherwise wonderful writers who are obviously attempting to be accessible and pleasing to everyone.
    “If you try to please everyone, you’ll end up pleasing no one.”
    There are SO many people out there sharing their stories/thoughts, why waste everyone’s time (including your own) reading and grumbling about what doesn’t resonate with you? I’m in no way directing that towards whoever prompted this post – just talking in general.
    Everyone has different interests and wants to read different things, and there’s something out there for everyone, if you’re willing to look.
    I love the diversity you can find online – it’s what makes the Internet such an exciting place!

    • Rica Lewis
      May 26, 2016

      I love every line in your comment, Phoebe. And “When you try to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one” nailed it! Yes! Thanks for sharing your wisdom.

  • Paula
    May 26, 2016

    Your post inspires me! I often fall into the trap of censoring myself for fear of hurting someones feelings in my blog, either directly or indirectly. But sometimes I need to let the sailor mouth open and talk about topics that aren’t all cute and cuddly. And that’s ok. You can either look at it or scroll past it. I write for me first, and for my readers second. They can stick around for the ride or get off at the next stop!

    • Rica Lewis
      May 26, 2016

      Great way to put it, Paula! For me, writing has always been my art. And if I don’t write what resonates with me, it just doesn’t work. Thanks so much for reading and sharing your thoughts!

  • Megan Gonzalez
    May 26, 2016

    Great title! Had me checking it out. I think you should use and love your voice. That’s what matters most. I worry too much about what others think and I should cut it out and focus on what I think 🙂

    • Rica Lewis
      May 26, 2016

      Wonderful tips, Megan! Thanks so much for reading!

  • Silly Mummy
    May 27, 2016

    I’ve always loved that quote, & love the post. What a strange reason for someone to object too! The only people I would expect to have been annoyed by that post would be men who like to send penis pictures. & I’d be pretty surprised to see them going on rants against your post to defend their pictures, to be honest. So I’m amazed that you actually got any negative response. Oh well, as you say, better they go elsewhere anyway!

    • Rica Lewis
      May 27, 2016

      My thoughts, too. Silly Mummy. So glad to see you here. Thanks for reading. 🙂

  • Molly Stevens
    May 28, 2016

    Well said, Rica. I don’t have a lot of subscribers, so it is hard for me not to feel a twinge (okay a stab) in my heart when one leaves me. But I remember that 10% of the people I meet won’t like me for no apparent reason, so why wouldn’t the same hold true of my writing? The ones who stick around for my best and my worst are the ones I will treasure. And I will treasure the freedom to write from my heart and quirky mind without censoring my creativity to please the masses. (okay for a few people who have been smart enough to subscribe). #blogsharelearn

    • Rica Lewis
      May 28, 2016

      That’s awesome, Molly. And I like the word “freedom.” Yes! Thanks for reading and commenting.

  • Donna Parker
    May 28, 2016

    Love a good rant, love a great one even more!!! Dropped by from Elena’s lovely #BlogShareLearn – always glad to drop by here anytime. 🙂
    Hope this weekend treats you kindly. 🙂

    • Rica Lewis
      May 28, 2016

      Thank you so much, Donna. Always glad to see you here!

  • Kimmie
    May 29, 2016

    I read the Penis post… I thought it needed saying (and you said it well). I’m more offended by the jerk who thought his junk would go well with your breakfast than I am to your rant about it. … Well said IMO.

    • Rica Lewis
      May 29, 2016

      Ha ha! You rock, Kimmie! Thanks for that lovely little comment. 🙂

  • Rahul Agarwal
    May 30, 2016

    It’s important to ‘be you’ coz no matter what there’ll always be people who’ll hate you. Sometimes even for made-up, outright idiotic and bull-shit reasons.

    That’s something I learned from Mr. Steven P. Jobs.
    If no more, I have one reason why I absolutely loved your rant, it’s original, it’s authentic.

    Oops that’s two reasons. 🙂

    • Rica Lewis
      May 30, 2016

      Ha ha! Super sweet of you to give me those reasons, Rahul! Great to see you again! 🙏🏼

  • Taylor Mobley
    May 30, 2016

    That is awesome. Blogs are no plan for their writers to dilute themselves 🙂

  • Rhonda Swan
    May 30, 2016

    You have to be who you are for sure. Keep up the great work and live unstoppable!

  • Faye
    June 10, 2016

    Perfectly said! Be you and the right audience will always remain.

  • Sara
    June 14, 2016

    Blogging started out being a place where you can just write what’s on your mind. Over the past 15 years, it’s morphed into a comparison trap with money and ‘fame’ attached.

    I understand someone wants inspiration and there are writers who meet this need.

    In a world where our words are monitored (work, family, etc), it is great to have a space to call your own. Even this place doesn’t get the full extent of your thought process as in some ways, the fact that it is pubic keeps some stuff bottled inside even unconsciously.

    The title and message drew me to this post and I like to believe that we are all Monkeys (some more publically than others).

    • Rica Lewis
      June 14, 2016

      All true statements, Sara. I think a lot of people do blog for love of writing, but there are those who see all the get-rich-quick (from your couch) schemes and think starting a blog is a good option. We who have been at it a while know that’s just ludicrous. And yes, some of us fit the monkey description better than others. 🙂 Thanks for reading and commenting!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *